I am destined to live my life alone. Thats quite a statement, isn't it? You may think, "You dont have to be alone! I'm here for you!" In the end, no, not really, you arent. Because there is only so much you can do from the outside, looking in. You may say, "Then let me in! I only want to help you." The likelyhood of that is slim, considering thats the problem. Everyone, EVERYONE; EVERY. SINGLE. PERSON. I have ever let in has betrayed and abandoned me. My closest friends, my girlfriends. my Brothers, all of them. They turn their backs and walk away. Now you say, "How could you think that I would do that to you?! I would never do such a thing!" I'll tell you why. Those are the EXACT words that made me let them in. VERBATIM.
I really wish it wasnt like that. I dont want hurt anymore. I dont want to be empty anymore. I DONT WANT TO BE ALONE ANYMORE. But with all the scars, open wounds, and festering sores from all I've been through already, I dont know how many more times I can take off my shell, just to get stabbed in the back again.
I hope this outlet of my depression doesnt scare you off. I promise, it wont happen often. I just feel that, once in a while, I should be genuine and take off my Face. For those of you that dont understand that reference...no. some other time. It's late. Until next time.
I am here for you in the way that you won't ever have to let me in if you don't want to. We live very far apart from each other. I'm not your best friend. I'm probably one of the last people you'd think of turning to in a hard time, but I am still here and I can offer you that, whether you want to tell me everything or nothing at all. I just would like to be a friend to you in any way that I can.
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Does it help to know that others feel this way, too? So, basically, you're not alone in feeling alone.
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